I can not believe that I got through the night without doing any SH,it was not easy,but being on the bus is helping me alot,and I need to add things to my coping box and I am working on that,even though I am having a hard time. My anxiety level is still high and the thought of doing SH,is there,the urge is hard to deal with sometimes. I want to thank everyone there who has been very supportive to me,and I will continue to write on the bus web board. I am still having problems of finding pictures to color,like Hello Kitty,cats,butterflies and dolphins,if anyone knows of a good website,please let me know. It has been real hard for me and I am get soo tired of it,but I am trying to be strong.It is hard when my parents do not understands my illness,my boy-friend is trying to help,but I know that he gets frustrated,cause he does not know what to do to help me,and that makes me feel bad inside,cause I know that it is hard for him as well.There are times that I have to take it one minute at a time and other days are better then other.I get so angry with myself,cause I am trying so hard and I just want the anxiety to go away and the urge to do SH,but I know that it takes times. I just wanted to let you know that I got through the night,and I am proud of myself for that.It is so hard for me.You are weclome to Pm if you like,or write on the bus.Hanging in there
I am giving myself a

Doing the best I can.

I am in a dark place like a turtle afraid to deal with the pain that I do not want to feel,but eventually I will slowly face my pain,like the turtle when he comes out of his shell.
To find yourself,think of yourself first.